Michael Jackson Photo

Michael Jackson, at his death, was the undisputed King of Pop. He was a brilliant and complicated individual, who likely needed a real friend. But now you can channel that pain into comedy gold. Learn More

Voice set to Michael Jackson

Now dial our access number FOO
and enter BAR as your PIN

Phone number of the person you're calling

Please make an MP3 of my phone call
I want them to know the call is recorded
 

By placing a call you agree to Terms of Use

Soundboard (On Air)

Once your call is connected, you can press these buttons to play sound clips into your phone call.

Greetings Hello It's Michael Jackson Michael Jackson I can't believe you never heard of me, I'm a very popular entertainer I'm done So long Questions Well how about this? Can I stay with you tonight? Well, have you heard of MTV? How do you like the smell? Is it good? Does it smell good enough for you in there? Musical [music] [Sings Billie Jean Chorus] Miscellaneous Because Sex! Greed Money Motown Beat it Cookies For sex Handcuffs Peter Pan Somewhere Thriller! It could be Statements I'm a vegetarian and I don't drink I'm in pain all the time Imma slit my wrists I see God In a pure, loving, fun way When I was your age I had six gold records Well back in 1979 when my Off the Wall album got just one grammy nomination I can't sleep at night I slept on the floor In a mental institution I'm not afraid to say it The men handled me very roughly One time I asked to use the restroom There was doo-doo feces thrown all over the walls And it stunk, so bad I was outraged That's happened many times It's not a good idea I love them so much They enjoy it That's how we were raised My mind doesn't run that way I could never do something like that Money is the root of all evil It's people with a dirty mind that think like that Elephants and giraffes and crodiles and lions Positive Responses Hmmm I uhm... Yes Ok It's ok Sure Why not? Absolutely Of course! [Cough] [Giggles] It's true! Good, that's good You'd be amazed how often I hear that I could do something like that Give him hot milk That's what I see Negative Responses No No, that's wrong I'm sorry I'm afraid I can't quite say... I would slit my wrists first I'm not allowed to talk on that I wouldn't have a problem with it It's not where my heart is That I'm not Totally false None of it's true; it's BS That's someone else Not for sex! Just because it's in print doesn't mean it's the gospel